Who are you secretly married to?
A few years back I read that one of my favorite writers, Liz Gilbert, took a vow to her writing when she was young.
She committed to keep writing regardless of what it looked like, how it panned out, or how successful she became (or didn’t.) She went on to be very “traditionally” successful (international bestsellers, books made into films, years on the NYT best-seller list kind of successful) but part of why I’ve always loved her story is that these accomplishments sprang from a vow that would still exist even if none of that other stuff ever came to be.
A devotion that said:
I will honor you through thick and thin.
I will keep going even when things are hard.
I remain true to you even when I am beckoned by the trappings of a fast-paced, capitalist, expectations-laden society.
Last week another writer and artist that I really admire (Rae Serafina Barker) shared something that reminded me of this.
She said that she always feels terrified when she shares a big new project. She always feels exposed, vulnerable, and knows that this could totally flop (or meet crickets.) So when she takes these steps of vulnerability she intentionally thinks this thought:
“No matter how this goes, my dreams are safe with me.”
She goes on to say that her “dreams are bigger than any one outcome – any single success or failure. And that they’re safe because I can always make the decision to keep going + stay devoted to the path.”
These two women together reminded me of something that I wanted to remind you of:
We are married to something bigger.
We are in divine contract with sacred dreams.
We have taken vows that we can honor regardless of how the world responds.
This kind of commitment that is both starry eyed and gritty. Romantic and brutal.
I will stick with you no matter what, I promise.
Like me, you might have accidentally abandoned your vows and gotten married to the wrong thing. You might have made a vow to approval, or your bank account, or society. It’s easy to start cheating on our dreams with these “quick fix” accidental affairs, but luckily our dreams aren’t going to file from divorce from us. It’s never too late to refocus and recommit.
So, today I invite you to ask…
What are you married to?
How can you keep your dreams safe?
How will you make and honor vows to your most sacred practices?
Love,
Melissa
PS: Did you read any good books in January? Do you want a book journal where you can write about them? The Book Lover’s Companion is live and there’s even a version for Teens out now too. Check them out here.
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Read Rae Serafina Barker’s entire post here.