Let’s talk about death, bay-bee,
Let’s talk about you and meeee,
Let’s talk about all the good things and the bad things that may beeeeee 🎵🎵
“we are aware of impermanence and waterfalls”
If you lived through the 90’s in some form then you’ve probably got a certain song stuck in your head now – you’re welcome.
(If not go find some Salt-N-Pepa on Youtube – read this first and thank me later.)
But seriously, let’s talk about sex - er, death.
In the most fun and meaningful way possible, of course.
We’ve all heard that death and taxes are the only two certainties in life, right? We all (ostensibly) file our taxes every year by the end of tax season – but we don’t have a special day (or season) on which we address our own death.
I think we should – and that’s because we are ALL going to die.
You, me, Donald Trump, Beyonce, beloved Fluffy, that insta-influencer you follow, your neighbor who’s always jogging the neighborhood with her baby, Justin Bieber. (To be clear her baby and Justin Bieber are two separate people, but I digress.)
Anything with a heartbeat will someday cease to exist and be among the “quiet dust” that Emily Dickinson wrote about when she pondered death herself.
It’s one of the only commonalities that ALL of us share –that every human (or life form) that’s ever existed shares.
Yet…we ignore it.
We carry on about our day to day as though we’ll last forever – putting many important things off and making time for stuff we don’t necessarily value.
“I’ll do that someday…”
“One day, when I have more confidence I’d like to…”
“I’m too old to pursue that but it would have been really cool if…”
Thinking that we’re too old OR that there’s an unlimited amount of time in front of us does exactly the same thing: it keeps us stuck.
It allows us to stay in the same familiar quagmire, the muck of water we’ve been swimming in for so long we don’t even realize we could totally leap out of the bowl and DO THE DAMN THING.
(Insert goldfish parable here – but seriously, what if we acted like we were the ocean in a drop, rather than a goldfish swimming in a tiny bowl?)
I’m bringing up death NOT to be depressing or ironic or silly (but don’t threaten me with a good time.)
I bring death up because it’s the final destination for ALL OF US and if we ignore it, we might also be pretending that our time here is unlimited.
If we think our time here on earth is unlimited then we might not be very cognizant of how we’re spending it.
If we’re not cognizant of how we’re spending our time, we might be one of those people who gets to the end of life and realizes that they missed the boat.
Death can depress us and make it tough to love/connect/etc., but it can also be the ignition under our butts to DO the thing.
To do ALL the things.
And I know, I’m sounding like every meme out there that’s like “waaaah how many ladies skipped dessert the night the Titanic sank waaaah”
But let’s go on a little thought journey for a sec.
I know you’re probably reading this on your phone, but really tune in and don’t skim. Be here with me.
Bring into your mind the idea of a New Years style countdown clock.
Every breath we take, every hour, every day – it’s getting us closer not JUST to the weekend, but also to OUR DATE.
Ya know, the date that passes every year and is ALSO the date on which you’ll die.
We all have a birthday and we all have a Death Day – just ask any tombstone.
Whether you wanna think about it or not, that date is coming. Every trip around the sun we all pass ours once.
So if we’re all on the same page that the date is coming, and it could be soon but let’s just be hopeful that (because we take good care of our health and safety) we’ve got some time…it still begs the question:
How will you want to look back on your life from that date?
If—in thought—you’ve now arrived at your DAY, you have an instant (or maybe a few) to think back on how you spent your time, where you put your energy, and how you lived.
It’s all over, so there’s no changing anything now.
Was it the way you wanted to live?
Did you live in a way that you’re proud of?
Can you say you’re glad that you did all the things, the scary things, the vulnerable things, the big and small things that your soul asked of you?
Did you listen to the call of your inner guide, or did you stay in the safe and familiar? Did you take some leaps and fall flat ass on your face in front of God and everybody, or did you tip toe carefully with your hair coiffed and your Facebook perfectly curated?
Did you go gently into that dark night, or did you skid bruised and battered and full of good stories and a sense of humor into the grave?
How will you want to look back?
Okay, let’s bring it back to now, to the razor thin slice of your life (the present moment) that dictates how the rest of it will go.
Is your life currently the way you’ll eventually want to look back at it?
Is your energy going toward being authentically you, bringing forth the big and small ideas – creating, risking, speaking up, admitting your feelings, asking for the raise, writing the book, sharing honestly?
Are you present for your life?
Are you here right now, or are you thinking about how you need this post to be over already so that you can go check Instagram or the score of the game?
Are you the you that’s truly you, or are you the you that others want you to be? (Have I been reading a lot of Dr. Seuss? Maybe…)
Let’s remember that our time here is not unlimited.
The clock IS ticking, and keeping that in mind is a GOOD thing.
Rather than being depressed by this impermanence, let it be your reason to do the thing.
Your reason to:
Have the conversation
Take the class
Ask for the raise
Share how you feel
Go on the date
Treat your dreams to dinner
Bring your idea out of your head and into the light
Wear the chicken costume.
What is your thing?
Are you doing it?
Until next time,
Melissa
Be the chicken you wish to see in the world, remember?